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- My Spouse Struggles with Homosexuality | Focus on the Family
His demeanor also change when the guy is there. He brag about how, he is so happy to see him etc. And I am standing right there. And when I go to work on Sundays, I come home to this man once again at my house like wtf! My byfriend takes a a lot of feminine postures. When he talks he moves his hands more like a ladies do. He never compliments other women, even when i do expecting to hear his opinion.
He compliments men instead, the first thing he notices on a guy is wether they are handsome or not and even talks about it with me. Do i have to worry if he is gay or its a normal thing that some men do? Please help. Does his social media following have alot to do with it? He has openly gay men following him My guy will eventually leave me for a guy.
I know it. He is into all things gay and acts like a queen. He wants to be treated 'like a princess' and keeps snogging guys. This article is very naive. I wasn't sure but seemed I felt there is like a fiber that he is somewhat gay after learning it from her sister that he was then I found out one time when we visited his male friend I saw in his actions that he was so happy meeting him as like a long lost lover.. My boyfriend talks to a lot of gay guys He plays video games as well with some gays and straights and they talk very innapropriate He is also very feminine.
He also hates gay men and is uncomfortable around gay men which is wierd. Maybe it is just that my conversation is lacking. I am wondering that my bf might be gay or bi? Not sure how to approach the subject without hurting, insulting him or making him angry? Maybe I should just walk instead. My boyfriend watches gay porn, and I mean a lot of it. I asked him to stop watching porn, and today I found tons more in his search history.
Not any female-male porn at all. My boyfriend jokes about being gay a lot He says I'm gay too Is he abusive or a homosexual? Whenever he sees a gay male couple, he seems obsessed with looking at them. He starts touching his lips and neck. He seems to try not to stare, but, keeps looking over. If we're in a restaurant, he'll turn his chair slightly away from me, and towards their table, so that he can keep looking over at them.
I've asked him subtly about this, but, he always denies that he's interested in anyone but me. He used make homophobic comments, but, has finally stopped, due to peer pressure. He always wants to go to male gay movies. Yes because of how he acts around his guy friends,and all ways nice to them more than his wife. My ex always hated gay men. He was narcissistic and when i was friends with my current boyfriend he always made comments about his blonde hair and blue eye swedish decent and about the light shining out of his swedish ass.
He would sit very close to our daughters boyfriend with his leg crossed bouncing it up and down and giggling about something on his cell phone. He got a gift for his friend at works son and told his friend that my daughter has a crush on him, and she never did but i think it was my ex that had a crush on his work friend. His work friend also had blonde hair and blue eyes.
I have a boyfriend. At the first time, i dont think that he is gay. But after I upload my picture with him in my media sosial, there are some my friend especially boy ask to me "he is normal? Since my friend asking about it, i have try to get information. He get study at one of university of UK. Then i get from his media sosial some picture when he get study.
He join with one of gay club there. And I look there are so many picture of him and his friend. And at that picture, so many picture he hug with his friend. What do you think? Literally broke up with the guy because he seemed sooo gay, girly overall, he called his mom HUN and got off on taking selfies of himself I've actually confronted my boyfriend about him being gay and he just laughs and says things like "I'm comfortable with myself and I know what I want or I can't believe you actually think that way of me" But something in me just tells me he might be gay.
Specially his homophobic side. Confronting him has got me no where. I just know he won't admit it.. My bf is totally gay It's really hard for me to come to terms with it all.. I feel so alone. For 5 yrs the guy that was supposed to be my life partner has hooked up other men from craigslist just about every other month. I suspected him to be gay the 1st week. It didnt bother me but the deception did. Im about an 8 on the scale of attractiveness.
At least body. He'll actually turn to the side when passing by me if I'm naked in the bathroom so he doesnt touch me. The same way a straight guy might do in the locker room. Hes turned me down a couple of times for sex. He actually called into work 1 day in order to go see some guy he contacted from CL that morning. So, yes, hes Gay. Been with my fella for 2 years now and found him on fabswingers taking to men dressed up as woman so i confronted him and he told me he thought they was woman so i forgave him but recently ive found gay pornsites on my history im so confused does this mean he bi?
He started out in this 4 year relationship just crazy head over heels in love with me. Spoiled me with his attention then I had life changing event. Our intimacy has gone totally out the door. I found on his phone several texts that were very inappropriate for a person in a relationship. They obviously have a relationship going on and a good one. Queen told him what he was going to have done when he got there after work.
That explains why he never had any vacation time for our family. If a man doesn't like homosexual activity around him that does not mean he's gay or homophobic My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years. At first it was cheating with various girls, but then I went through his email and found he had been using Craigslist and apps to sext prostitues and couples looking for men to join them. He did end up hooking up with a prostitute during a business trip, but I forgave him and he sought counseling.
Still with counseling, he is still using Craigslist and sexting pictures of himself. Over time he has seemed less and less interested in me. Last night he asked me to have a threesome with another guy. I find this especially odd since I consider him somewhat homophobic. Sorry, but if he led you on he is a bad person. No matter if it was with another woman or a guy.
Bad people lead on other people not good people, obviously I f he didn't know in the beginning of the relationship he has to tell his girlfriend as soon as he finds out. And if he a husband - he would have to resist the temptation of other women too, so this is the same category. I had his phone and was of course going through it cause he talks to many females My boyfriend and I were close friends for a really long time before dating and during those times he would get really really close with our other guy friends. I just always thought he was joking around and just having fun but now I think he was having a little too much fun.
You're right to find this kind of weird. Unless he's really, REALLY good friends with this guy, then probably some kind of transaction is going on between them. It is certainly possible he may be having sex with this guy, or is at least stringing the guy along making him think that he's going to get something. Well, it certainly sounds like he's in denial about something. Usually when people get defensive, there's some shame involved. He might be gay or bi and not want to admit it to himself Indeed, it sounds like your boyfriend might be bi and he wants to explore that part of himself again.
If you don't have a problem with it seems like the two of you already have no problem engaging with multiple partners , then I wouldn't worry about it too much. Just make sure he knows to always use protection. I've asked him about it and he just cusses me out about it. They're not related the man is actually 42 and my bf is He has and stronge smell came from his butt befor shower and after shower he always on the toilets don't like to be touch no cuddled no conversation with me only happy around men very loud so people notic him expressly men delete all male callers etc He has all the signs and more to it.
I always thought he was cheating or gay. But apparently he just might be both. My high school boyfriend and I were each other's first, both late bloomers and neglected kids. He had sexual encounters as a youth with a boy neighbor. His 19 year marriage to an older frigid woman ended in divorce after we reunited. It's been 5 years and he is very attracted to men who look like him and wants to be with a man.
We have sex on overdrive and attend swingers events and parties as exhibitionist. He wants to have sex with every woman there and now men, but hasn't yet. Last night he commented that he would like to be with a man when I next leave for a weekend. I'm thinking he is bi but not sure. Do not date this man again.
Jesus, this guy did all of this to you--even gave you a disease--and you're still just concerned about the fact that he might be gay? Since I don't know him personally, there's no way to know if he's really gay. From what you describe, I personally would assume he's neither gay nor straight--plenty of people are somewhere in between. However, as I said, there's no way you or I can know for sure. Only he knows that. The fact that he was increasingly impotent probably has nothing to do with his sexuality, though.
He's an older guy, which means his testosterone levels might have taken a dive. This hormone is essential for his performance. Supplements don't really help this much; only direct administration of testosterone will raise his levels significantly. Also, he takes nervous system depressants like alcohol on a regular basis.
This combo of age and drug abuse will almost certainly make any guy have performance issues. You deserve more than the way that he treated you. If he's addicted to drugs, the drugs will always come first for him. It sounds like he doesn't have every high standards for his life, so why would he have high standards for your relationship? Having unprotected sex with him especially in the back entrance, which is more dangerous is a bad idea as well, especially if you suspect that he's been fooling around. Extra especially if you suspect that he has been fooling around with other men with no protection.
Just don't do it. There are nice men out there who would be happy to be in a committed relationship with you and wouldn't run around doing drugs or two-timing you. The first issue I see here is that if he made those appointments during your relationship not before you got together , then he cheated. That's a bigger problem than his being with a trans lady. Unless you have an open relationship or something. To answer your question, though, lots of guys find trans women to be taboo and exciting. Believe it or not, most of those guys are straight.
The vast majority, in my experience.
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I've known many, many trans women, and most of their boyfriends are straight. I've also known a few trans ladies who were working girls, such as the kind your boyfriend might have visited, and most of their customers are straight men. If you think about it, it kind of makes sense: Gay guys are interested in men, not women. It's uncommon, in my experience, for a gay guy to be attracted to any kind of woman, transsexual or otherwise. Though it does occasionally happen. So most guys who are into trans women are straight, and some might be bi. Like you said, it is sometimes true that a closeted gay guy might try to experiment at first with a trans woman if he's in denial.
However, if he really is gay and only interested in men, he probably wouldn't do this multiple times. Being with a trans woman is a very different experience from being with a man, and most gay men would not find it too exciting. But i guess got scared of reality and we ended up together almost 5 years. The reason we aren't together is he had numerous affairs and my gut says that they all weren't just with women.
But he still days hes straight. Hes 40 years old 3 kids 3 different mommas and never bern married. I was to blind to see all his red flags. I have been with my man for almost 3 years. The first time we decided to have sex he apologized to me due to his inability to get and maintain an erection. I just figured first time performance issues.
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We moved in together soon after and not only did this issue continue but the frequency of attempts at having sex diminished greatly. He continued to have erection problems all the time. He was affectionate at times. He was getting high and we figured his impotence was due to that. Then the drinking became prevalent and the impotency became a huge problem. It was very frustrating in the bedroom trying over and over with no results. He was at least providing oral sex to me until he matter of factly stated one night while in bed as he was performing oral sex on me that he didn't like it at all.
Up until this point I just chalked it up to the drinking and drugs. He had also gone to the doctor to get help. He received a prescription for Cialis which I was more than happy to purchase. He also tried using some testosterone supplements to help. He said he would try it but when I would suggest that we finally try it out, he would drink to, I believe to prevent its effectiveness. I have to backtrack a bit, in the beginning he was not at all embarrassed by showing off his body in all its glory to me.
We are both in our 50's. He is very fit and I had just lost 70 lbs but still insecure about my body and being my first relationship in over 10 years, it was reasonable. Well, as I said he loved prancing around showing off. However I started to become concerned when as he was showing off he would be admiring himself in the mirror and then turn his back to the mirror, spread open his butt cheeks and say so proudly what a gorgeous asshole he had. He did this almost daily. I became concerned and thoughts started to swirl around in my head with ideas that I didn't want to believe.
Not too long after that he told me about sexual encounters that he had had with a gay male neighbor when he was about My boyfriend stated that he partook in this activity quite a few times. He said that it was strictly for the money. At this point we had been together for about a year and I loved him so much that I really was mixed up about what to think but I wasn't willing to let our relationship fail because of something that happened so long ago, but his behavior was very disconcerting to me.
He also told me that whenever he had had a relationship with a woman, that the woman would support him exclusively. He didn't work.
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So now the word gigolo came to mind. I started to think about everything he had said, his previous experiences, his unusual admiration for his asshole, his inability to get an erection, living off of women and his yearly HIV testing and wondered if my partner was gay or bisexual. He has a daughter that is gay and when she told him he became very aggressive and enraged that he cut off all contact. It has been over 15 years since he saw or spoke to her. As time went on this situation of no intimacy led to many fights and my feelings became much stronger towards what I believed his sexual preferences were.
I am still very much in love with him. I don't know what to think. I can't broach the subject with him for fear of aggression towards me. He tells me that he loves me then the next he hates me. He says I am the reason his life is screwed up, that is the addict talking. Unfortunately at a point when things were extremely bad between us just about three months ago we had a very bad fight and he went on a binge.
I wouldn't allow him back in our home unless he got treatment. He choose to go to the city and get high but this time on heroin. He ended up at some unknown females apartment. He told me that he was so high that he collapsed in her shower and that she assisted him in getting out. He stayed with her for days unbeknownst to me. I asked if had sex with her and he said no. At this time I was out of state because of a family emergency but he and I were talking and he wanted to come home and I said okay with conditions that he agreed to.
When I went to pick him up in the city he was so high and his nose was covered in scabs from snorting heroin. I asked if he had sex with her but he insisted no. I replied how the heck would you know if you were so high. I decided that I couldn't deal with his addiction any longer and basically we lived as roommates. My nephew recently died from an overdose and I went to stay with my sister at that time but he was calling and texting me to come home asap. He was going to be leaving and we were going our separate ways until he finished with long term rehab.
On my way home he texted me that he had a surprise waiting for me. The surprise was that he wanted to make love to me and that he wanted my ass. At this point I didn't care because this would be the first time that he could maintain an erection and hopefully please me. It was good but very awkward. It seemed like I was with someone who was very inexperienced or maybe a first timer. It didn't take long for him to request to perform anal and I was willing. That is when I saw and felt a different person emerge. He was no longer the inexperienced person that had just been inside of me.
I didn't say much and for the first time ever I couldn't wait for it to be over. I was so not in to him. He is back in rehab and this one seems to be working. He did call me one day asking if I had anything to confess to him maybe about being with someone else because he was having an issue. This prompted me to go to the doctor to get tested for an STD and thanks to him having sex with that skank he left me with a lifetime gift. He broke it off with me the same day I called to tell him that my dad had died.
I have had very limited contact with him. Some letters to him nothing more. No visits he says he doesn't want to see me. Then last night I see a text that was extremely weird from him late at night saying he wants to see me and he misses me. I am not responding for many reasons but the biggest one that is foremost is his sexual preferences and the transmission of the STD.
I believe in for better or worse and I have had plenty of worse. I can live with most of what has happened except if he is gay. Please read this and let me know what you think. Am I being suspicious for no reason or are his actions something I should be concerned about and move on? I recently found out my boyfriend has had a few encounters with Transexuals So the imagery of it was normal for him and that made it feel ok.
To begin with we had sex few times then it got less often. By 6 months in I knew something was wrong and blamed myself. Thought I was too fat too old etc.. But it carried on no sex no touching and no kisses. We were away on holiday and he was sound asleep, being very cagey about his phone, I decided to go through it. Never get opportunity like this I thought. I copied the name he used and saved. The night before we left he was with another guy. He had been posting on different sites for over 2 yr. I was totally and utterly devastated. Thank god there was only a day left and the journey home was not easy.
Had to stop myself crying and trying to act normal. Home, he dropped me off and the moment he left i fell apart. So I made my profiles, went on my mission to get solid evidence that couldn't be denied. And I got this, in the form of pictures of his face and dick on one shot. Many dick pics and his address. He gave me everything I needed and all the details of dogging,times places, often invited me and to his home. I eventually with everything I had on him confronted him. Plus I had catfish couple of guy on sites and one knew him and was besides himself.
I walked away, hurt and devastated, by this time lost 4 stone from the stress and lies. I felt broken and almost suicidal if honest, was few other things he put in place to distract me, like I believed that he may die. Asking me if so please arrange things.. I have to this day never had any explanation or apologies. Moved in with new hope and optimism in my heart. The 1st day of our new life I could see in his face what he had been doing night before. Bit hurt I thought leave it there. So new life Talked to him many times.
Cried myself to sleep many times. He would come to bed just before I had to get up before work. Rarely did we go to bed at same time. I was hurting and frustrated with all this.
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Started sleeping on sofa because wasn't going to give him space to do his nasty thing. I started to resent and kind of gay things on TV and would make me angry. Mostly wam bam 30 second job. After 2yr of living together, I finally broke and after finding on my tablet he'd search for hook ups, feeling pretty crappie and unbelievable amount of hurt I toohingsablethrew him out. Now he wants me to apologise for this feel sorry for him. Yet he wants me but wants his seedy life to!! No way. It didn't have to be this way, many many times I told him that I will support him, be there blah blah..
Short of busting that wardrobe door off with a pick axe laying a red carpet and fanfare nothing more I could have done. The wiff of mothballs follow him. It's the lies deception and how dirty his secret became. The utter rejection I felt and the emotional tournament I'might still going through. There's help out there for men to come out, where is the help for women who have been through this??
I recently found out that my boyfriend was video skyping with women and men for virtual sex. Our sexual life was not really working very well due to some bad experiences with his ex girlfriends He is a very quiet person and ver introverted, he doesn't have friends or any interest in making. What should i belive? My brother is gay. The only thing is that whenever I text or call him he takes hours, days, or just will not care to respond.
Also, if i ask him to hangout he will decline. I thought at first maybe he is just playing hard to get, because he eventually does end up getting in touch with me. I told him up front that I liked him, and asked him straight up if he was gay. However, if my brother texts him he almost always answers back right away, and if my brother asks him to hang out, he will usually come out with both of us and a few other friends.
Iv been with my boyfriend nearly 4 years and we have a nearly 2 year old child together. Tough situation. You know him better than anyone here does, so you are in the best position to judge this.
My Spouse Struggles with Homosexuality
I will say this, though: Many guys of our generation live in a fantasy world. We grew up getting our jollies off videos on the Internet instead of real sex. For a small percentage of guys, this severely alters their ability to have a real-life physical relationship. The hyper-stimulation of what they see at the strip club or online makes actual sex with a normal person seem boring by comparison. The fact that he watches girl-on-girl stuff makes me think that he's not necessarily gay, since the vast majority of gay guys are not interested in this type of material. However, the fact that he "maybe" kissed a guy seems Maybe he's bi.
Maybe he's not anything in particular. That's the bigger issue here, I think. I'm not sure if he's gay but I think he is. He uses my tweezers and snaps his fingers in a playful way saying oh no boo boo.. He talks with a lot of guys and touches his self a lot while looking at other men in public. I've asked him before if he's gay pretty much he brush it off.
I've asked him why he keep touching his self looking at other men he tells me I'm making it out what to what I want. Which is far from the truth. When you're with someone for years or even months, you noctice a lot things. Such as, how he treats you and talk to you and just things he use to do. Can someone please tell me if you've had an similar experience and if your mate actually turned out to be gay.
I'm 38yrs old an have been with other guys but this one seems like he doesn't want to touch me as much as all the others? He has nothing but naked we on on his screen saver an talks about how he likes the look of we on but I really can't understand why he doesn't seem to want to touch me even for a slight coress?
I think my boyfriend is gay I confronted him but he denies it, and I have no proof of him being sexually with men. I know the truth.. Well, After going through his phone and reading text messages I realized that him and his home boy male friend exchanged selfies That's not a buggy because it was nasty pics and nasty tact talk. The problem is why are two home boys exchanging pics when they work together everyday. It just seem like a more feminine thing to do. There have been times we were out late and he said it was his home boy calling him.
It happened to on my bday when we were out late at a party. At least twice I seeen him step away to take his call saying it's his friend. I'm thinking ugh Then again it could've been a female and he just lied. I'm the one asking for it not him and he has never came while inside. He's always around a lot of his buddies who work with him. The desire to go out and fornicate with me has diminished. I'm the aggressor when it comes to that. He's always tired, busy or another time. Now I've noticed his male friend staying at the house. His brother stays there too and they have the same friends so that can always be the excuse I asked my bf does he stay there now and he replied with an attitude whi stays with you!?
A simple question. I just broke up with a guy several months ago because I had a strong suspension that he was gay i brush off rumors of him being gay bcuz he explained that he was staying with a gay friend or family me. What if he was cheating with girls that look like dudes and have those masculine characteristics? I use to think he was cheating or gay. Now that we confirmed he was cheating I can't help to think why? I mean at least if it was for a hotter chick that could make a little sense.
I mean he shows sexual desire when he takes a pill. Aside from that he tries everything to get out of doing anything with me. I'm am frustrated and I think he knows this so he makes excuses. He'd rather spend hours and hours with guys or watching fights on YouTube. My self esteem has dropped so low and feel I just tolerate it just to not be alone. It's not that I can't get guys it's just I'm reaching forty and don't really want to go on the quest on finding a soulmate.
Just last night after work, his phone was ringing so I answered, when i hung it up he had 3 Notification messages from an app called Jack'd. I was shaking I thought it was going to be a dating site did I say I was shaking just as I'm putting in his email address, he text me asking if he hopes I'm happy with what I found. I went right to him and asked him "what the hell is Jack'd" I know what I saw. But I didn't say one word except "I know what I saw" No nothing I believe my husband married me to cover his sexuality, i feel doomed, we've been married 3 months n had sex 4 times n then it's just wam bam.
And I agree, if I'm dating a woman is because I'm interested in a long relationship with her, just like I'm attracted to blond women I'm attracted to tall men, or adorkable women. But knowing that your SO is ok with your taste and preferences is really cool and makes a guy fall in love with someone!! I already kind of new MY now ex boyfriend was gay because of the fact that I caught him multiple times trying to find tansexuale escorts on the internet.
It's just feels better now reading all of this and seeing that I had the right decision to end the relationship before anything happened to me. I am a gay man and I had suspicious that my boyfriend might be gay too. This article really opened my eyes thanks you so much! Hahaha, yes, I've never heard of a straight guy wanting his girlfriend's hair to be short.
Even when she gets one of those pixie cuts or whatever you call them, it's mostly grudging acceptance. It could also mean he doesn't believe in having premarital sex for religious reasons. Then again he could be using that as an excuse to maintain a public appearance of having a girlfriend. You just never know. I suppose you can gage by how passionate the wet kisses are and if there's any real effort to fight off the temptation of having sex.
What Is Sexual Orientation? On the other hand, here are some signs that are better indicators that your boyfriend might actually have a preference for men: Watch him closely next time he is around gay men. Does he act weird? How do you find out whether or not he's on a gay dating site, though? See below, about bisexual guys. Bisexual Men: The Silent Minority Your boyfriend could also be bisexual. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you.
Nobody likes living a lie. Sources Reams, Richard H, Ph. Yes No I don't have a boyfriend; I just read this article because I'm procrastinating on the Internet. Why am I here? What am I doing with my life? See results. Yes, but I already thought that. Yes, and this article opened my eyes. No, this article convinced me that he isn't gay. No, and this article made no difference. Leave a Comment If you suspect that your boyfriend is secretly gay, or have recently discovered that he is, leave a comment below with your story.
My boyfriend talks on the phone with gay guys late at night, on Facetime. Helpful If a guy keeps having sex with guys and likes to be embarrassed about it is he gay? Hey, don't look at me. I didn't program the human mind. It can be weird, for sure. My boyfriend picks playing video games with other guys over me, is he gay? Among the things you may be feeling are:. Get checked immediately for sexually transmitted diseases, whether or not your partner admits to any sexual infidelity. Take care of yourself as you go through the grieving process.
Your relationship has changed. Try to accept this reality and move forward.
Be careful how you tell your children. You may need professional guidance to deal with this. It's important for them to feel loved and secure and to know they're not to blame for the situation. Assume your marriage is over. However, studies show that out of 15 percent of couples who try to make it work, only about 7 percent make it over the long term. Let the years of deception and the sense of betrayal take away from the good times and the positive memories.
My Spouse Struggles with Homosexuality | Focus on the Family
Although the trauma of being a straight spouse or partner can be overwhelming, it is important to realize that the situation you find yourself in is not your fault. The first year will probably be the toughest as you sort out complicated feelings and decide how to move forward. These decisions may mean the end of your marriage. Some couples stay married and some don't.
Moving on and letting go will take time and a willingness to forgive. Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life. There was an error. Please try again. Thank you, , for signing up. Share Flip Email. More in Relationships. Then you discover the truth: The Family Pride Coalition compiled the following statistics: Among the things you may be feeling are: Sexual rejection Damaged sexual self-esteem Wondering things like "what did I do to cause this?